• 21 Tips for Parents
• Conversation Cards (printable-PDF)
• Conversation Starters
• Family Tree Activities (printable-PDF)
• Fun Family Activities
• Parent Classes
• Websites For Parents 
• Warning Signs
  
  

21 Tips for Parents
from the Office of National Drug Control Policy

Get Involved

1. Establish "together time." Establish a regular weekly routine for doing something special with your child—even something as simple as going out for ice cream
2. Don't be afraid to ask where your kids are going, who they'll be with and what they'll be doing. Get to know your kid's friends—and their parents—so you're familiar with their activities
3. Try to be there after school when your child gets home.  The "danger zone" for drug use is between 4-6 pm, when no one's around; arrange for adult supervision if you are not able to be there
4. Eat together as often as you can.  Meals are a great opportunity to talk about the day's events, to unwind, reinforce, bond. Studies show that kids whose families eat together at least 5 times a week are less likely to be involved with drugs or alcohol.

Learn to communicate

1. Be absolutely clear with your kids that you don't want them using drugs. Ever. Anywhere. Don't leave room for interpretation. And talk often about the dangers and results of drug and alcohol abuse. Once or twice a year is not enough.
2. Be a better listener.  Ask questions—and encourage them. Paraphrase what your child says to you.  Ask for his or her input about family decisions.  Showing your willingness to listen will make your child feel more comfortable about opening up to you.
3. Give honest answers. Don't make up what you don't know; offer to find out.  If asked whether you've ever taken drugs, let them know what's important; that you don't want them using drugs.
4. Use TV reports, anti-drug commercials, news or school discussions about drugs to help you introduce the subject in a natural, unforced way.
5. Don't react in a way that will cut off further discussion. If your child makes statements that challenge or shock you, turn those statements into a calm discussion of why your child thinks people use drugs, or whether the effect is worth the risk.
6. Role play with your child and practice ways to refuse drugs and alcohol in different situations. Acknowledge how tough these moments can be.

Walk the Walk

1. Be a living, day-to-day example of your value system.  Show the compassion, honesty, generosity and openness you want your child to have.
2. Know that there is no such thing as "do as I say, not as I do" when it comes to drugs.  If you take drugs, you can't expect your child to take your advice.  Seek professional help if necessary.
3. Examine your own behavior. If you abuse drugs or alcohol, know that your kids are inevitable going to pick up on it.  Or if you laugh uproariously at a movie when someone is drunk or stoned, what message does that send to a child?

Lay down the law

1. Create rules—and discuss in advance the consequences of breaking them. Make your expectations clear.  Don't make empty threats or let the rule-breaker off the hook. Don't impose harsh or unexpected new punishments.
2. Set a curfew.  And enforce it strictly.  Be prepared to negotiate for special occasions.
3. Have kids chick in at regular times. Give them a phone card, change or even a pager, with clear rules for using it.
4. Call parents whose home is to be used for a party. On party night, don't be afraid to stop in to say hello (and make sure that adult supervision is in place).
5. Make it easy for your child to leave a party where drugs are being used.  Discuss in advance how you or another designated adult will come to pick your child up the moment he or she feels uncomfortable. Later, be prepared to talk about what happened.
6. Listen to your instincts.  Don't be afraid to intervene if your gut reaction tells you that something is wrong.
   Praise and Reward
7. Reward good behavior consistently and immediately. Expressions of love, appreciation and thanks go a long way.  Even kids who think themselves too old for hugs will appreciate a word of thanks or congratulations.
8. Accentuate the positive. Emphasize the things your kid does right. Restrain the urge to be critical.  Affection and respect—making your child feel good about himself—will reinforce good (and change bad) behavior far more successfully than embarrassment or uneasiness.
   
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Parent Classes

About Parent to Parent:  A video based parent training series

Since 1988, Parent to Parent , developed by Bill Oliver, has provided millions of parents with practical "hands on" ideas for raising children in today's world. When it comes to preventing children from engaging in dangerous behaviors such as drug use, a trained and motivated parent is the greatest "prevention program" ever intended.

Parent to Parent is a video based adult training series designed to create a parent culture that is both supportive of youth and intolerant of the negative influences of modern society.  The purpose of the training is to develop the skills, abilities and confidence level of moms and dads in our community.

Well over one million parents and thousands of communities have included Parent to Parent as part of their long-term drug prevention strategy.

If you are interested in participating in a Parent to Parent facilitator workshop or a parent to parent session near you, contact MDC Coalition member Peg Hightower at 594-5070.  Ms. Hightower is a Drug & Violence Prevention Specialist with the Knox County Student Assistance Office.  She will be glad to tell you how you can become a Parent to Parent Facilitator so you can bring this powerful program to concerned parents in your neighborhood.

Making the decision to take a parenting class says a number of things about you the parent:
It says that you care.
It says that you value your children's lives as well as their future.
It says that you children rank very high on your priority list.
It says that you believe that you can and will make a difference in their lives.
It says that you already have a "valued family."
                                       -Bill Oliver, Parent to Parent Founder

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Conversation Starters

Starting a conversation about drugs, alcohol, and tobacco with your kids won't be easy, but it can stem from everyday situations and become a natural exchange between you and your children. Take advantage of these daily "teachable moments" and, you'll develop an easy and ongoing dialogue with your child. 

The following are "teachable moments" that can be a starting point, and lead you to develop your own opportunities for exchanges:

• Point out alcohol-, tobacco-, and drug-related situations going on in your own neighborhood. If you and your child are at the park and see a group of kids drinking or smoking, use the moment to talk about the negative effects of alcohol and tobacco.
• Use newspaper headlines or TV news stories as a conversation starter. The daily news is filled with stories that detail the consequences of alcohol and drug abuse. Talk to your child about the mother who used drugs and was arrested. Who will take care of her baby now? Did she make a good decision when she used drugs?
• Watch TV with your kids, and ask them what they think. Do the shows and advertising make drug use look acceptable and routine? Or do they show its downside? How did that program make your child feel about drugs? Write a letter with your child to companies or TV networks about the messages they put out about drugs. Also remember that anti-drug advertising—such as that from the Partnership for a Drug-Free America-is a great kickoff to discussion.
  
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Printable Family Tree Activities

Print out these activities for some fun, family time!

• Family Education Family Tree
  
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